About Me
My name is Gabby, it's not the name my mother gave me, it's the name I chose when I accepted the invitation to my own life.
You see, up until that point, I blamed everybody for what happened or hadn't happened in my life. I lived with anger, resentment, judgment, shame, and guilt. I destroyed my relationships, pushed people away, and made life terrible for myself and others.
I desperately wanted to connect with others but didn't know how. I was stuck on repeat and struggled to be me. I dreamed of a different reality.
Here is my story.
Be Real
Change takes time and transformation, well, it takes a bit longer.
But this doesn't mean you have to deny yourself until you reach your goal and live without happiness. Because "if you can't find happiness along the road, you won't find it at the end of the road".
I've lived most of my life holding off happiness until I realized that life was passing me by! I'm here to share my humanness and hope that you can find comfort know that we, that is, me, you and everyone else are not PERFECT.
Children Learn What They Live
HI, I'M GABBY
I love collecting quotes and poems that resonate with me. Many years ago I read Dorothy Law Nolte's poem, Children Learn What They Live. It struck me to the core.
Reading the poem while reflecting on who I was as a person, I realized that I was a good student. I had learned to criticize, to fight, to be apprehensive, to feel shy, to envy, to be jealous and to feel guilty.
I didn't have lessons in learning encouragement, tolerance, praise, acceptance, approval, recognition, sharing, honesty, fairness, kindness, consideration, security and friendliness. Nope. I didn't learn any of those things.
And as I look back on my life. I see the impact of what I did learn and how that shaped my life. What I did learn became my emotional toolkit. Which reminds me of the quote, when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
Let me make it clear, I'm not complaining about my life, nor am I blaming anyone. I accept full responsibility for the life I created and the life and I am creating.
I Lived What I Learned
And what I had learned prepared me to struggle.
I felt powerless because while I could see the impact of who I was in the faces of those reflected to me, I did not have any tools in my toolkit to change!
Maybe you've lived like this also. Wanting to change but not knowing how. Attending self development training after self development training seeking answers to unspoken questions. Feeling like you are broken, not loveable, wrong, bad and even worse not worthy.
Seeking the answer in other people then being disappointed with them because they couldn't fill the void in you. They became the problem. It is their fault.
I created a reality that was exactly opposite of what I wanted.
I have this belief, that at some point you are no longer a child and it's up to you to become the adult you want to be. I knew that the challenge ahead was going to be long, although I didn't think it was going to take this long! But hey, change comes when it comes.
I began to 'wake up' when I had my daughter, Riley. By that time I was conscious of who I was and what I
wanted to create for her. I began conscious parenting. Before I reacted to her, I would pause and ask if what I was about to do was going to be helpful to Riley. I was aware of the values I wanted her to have. It was tough while there were times when I failed. And there were times when it was, amazing.
At the end the day I have a daughter who is a beautiful and spirit that I never was. I also recognize this, I couldn't give what I didn't have. So I figured out that the qualities I've been wanting were inside me all this time.
Who looks outside, dreams; Who looks inside, awakes.
Carl Jung
Now I'm Living What I'm Learning
After years of struggle, slowly I'm changing. I've accepted that the only person who could create my life I wanted to live was ME. Hoping that I was going to meet someone who was going to make it all better, was tossed out the window when I realised that it was me I had be waiting for. It was up to me to create a ME I would love, and love myself enough, just as I am, to create that person.
Once I could see my value I could accept myself. And once I accepted myself I could accept others, without
judgment or criticism. I see the beauty in everything and everyone.
As a teacher this single knowingness alone helps me to connect with my students and with the younger me who wasn't affirmed. I am learning to use the tools in the toolbox in productive ways while I continue to add more.
I give myself empathy, and heal my emotional wounds so I can get on with living. I shifted from being dependent on circumstances to determine what was possible, to creating the circumstances I wanted to having my best life.
Transformation is a process, and I will be in this process for the rest of my life, and I'm okay with this. I am happier than I've ever been. I connect with myself and others in more meaningful ways, and I am healing my hurts and allowing myself to become me.
We teach best what we most need to learn.
Richard Bach
Coaching with Gabby
As a coach I love to work with people who are believe that everything they need is inside of them.
Whether I'm coaching children as an Experiential Educator or adults in my private practice I have one goal. To allow you to connect with that inner you that wants what you want. She is only waiting for you to to show up.
I recognize that you don't want help because you have a problem, we all have problems. You want help because the tools in your toolbox keep you stuck, running the same pattern over and over, and you no longer want that.
I am here to make a difference.
Every coach is different and my coaching style blends emergent knowledge, non violent communication with clean language which creates the perfect blend to facilitate your awareness to what is happening now, listen to the meaning of your words and move you through your landscape to what is possible.
The best way to understand is to experience it so I encourage everyone to have a free non obligation session to determine if we are a good fit.
Ready to move through change to transformation, schedule a no obligation session today.
